a time comes when we get so frustrated, disappointed, and can’t feel happy anymore! if it’s happening with you, you are not alone, so keep reading to find out what is true happiness, and how to find it?
what is true happiness, and how to find it?
you might have heard, happiness is a choice not condition! you can choose to be happy even when things are not going well.
true happiness is accepting yourself the way you are, regardless of what people think of you – Anonymouse
if you want to be truly happy, you should deeply understand yourself, that you are unique and you don’t have any comparison in this world.
where can we find true happiness
here lies the problem, we try to find happiness in other things or people instead of ourselves.
true happiness comes from within ourselves because happiness is just our thoughts, it’s a state of mind.
for example, let’s say you love someone, and she is very kind to you at that moment, and you are having a very good time.
you tie your happiness with her, if she is having a good chat with you, you cheer with happiness. but if she turns the other way round, you start to piss off with your life.
when someone does good to us, our expectations from that person increases, and that is the reason we tie our happiness with that person.
so when you try to find happiness in the relationship, you are saying a big no to true happiness!
can money make you happy?
it is obvious that we need money to service our lives, have better relationships, and keep our selves motivated.
but is it important to have a lot of money to be happy?
a study found that money can help with our happiness and motivation. but it only works for those, whose income is less than 75k a year.
it’s clear, that if you earn less then 6k a month, money can boost your happiness, but if you earn more than this amount, you can not make money as your happiness source.
is it possible to be happy all the time?
happiness is not eternal, it’s temporary, some times you will be happy and sometimes you won’t! it’s just the part of human nature, and that’s normal.
Sonja Lyubomirsky, a psychology expert the author of ‘ The how of happiness’ says,
when you are too much focused on remaining happy 24/7, it will make you unsatisfied, why? because when you expect to live happy all the time, then a little lower level of happiness also seems like a disappointment.
when we think of true happiness, we think of something unrealistic, we live in a fancy world, where there is no worries, right?
this sets our expectations from life too high, we expect no worries, no bad feelings, which is absolutely not possible!
so instead of expecting an ideal life, embrace the reality, and be normal.
the importance of happiness
Sonja LYubomirsky says in her TEDx talk, 6 out of 10 Americans consider happiness as an extremely important part of life.
why? because happiness influences many areas of our lives. Sonja analyzed 225 studies and found that,
- happy people are more creative
- they form better relationships
- their pay is higher than average people
Sonja LYubomirsky and her team did research in a school, where they gave a paper to each student and asked to circle the name of the boy, whom they wanted to play with.
1.5 of the boys chose those kids who were happier than others. this tells us that, happiness helps us make more relationships, and find new friends.
can you teach yourself to be happy
you can always learn to be truly happy, by changing your thoughts and habits. here are the 3 factors that decide how happy you are?
genetics are involved in our happiness up to 40%, 10% are our life circumstances like money, relationships, looks. the other 50% are our actions.
we are accountable for our happiness 50% of the time, which means half of the time it’s our actions, that decide how happy we are going to be?
many people believe that happiness has to do with genetics only! of course, genetics is the part of our happiness, but there is always room for happiness, science has proved that you can learn to be happy.
so that’s the what part of true happiness, now let’s understand the how to’s.
how to be truly happy
when we smile, our mind releases a chemical called dopamine. this chemical reduces our stress and makes us happier.
it’s not important that if something is funny, then you smile. it works every time when you do it. even when you are smiling for no reason!
I tested it myself, I got bored writing article and doing research, but when I started smiling, boom! Everything just changed, my mood shifted from boring to happiness.
don’t read anymore! until you smile and see the results.
2)do what you love
you might have heard do what you love and you won’t have to work in your life!
one of the common reasons people are not truly happy is because they don’t do what they love, 85% of people do what they hate, but they are still doing it.
when people don’t do what they love, these are the words they speak
- I don’t know what my passion is
- I don’t have time or money
- what if I failed?
imagine yourself, when Monday is your favourite day, I mean you love your job so much, that you don’t see any difference between workdays, and vacations.
the most important step to finding true happiness is, finding what you love, because even if you don’t see the results you will stick to it, without getting panic.
finding your true purpose takes time, but it’s worth it, when I took computer science as my major, I dint know that I will be quitting after 2 years.
I realized that computer programming is not for me, it’s boring! so I decided to start blogging, and now I enjoy blogging without seeing any good results, yeah cheers!
3) Do physical activities
if you don’t have any physical activities, chances are, you will be bored, unfit, and unsatisfied.
when you do any physical activity, your mind releases dopamine( happy chemicals), your physical and mental health gets better, you start to think positively, and chances of heart diseases reduce. here is what happens when you do physical activities.
- worries go away
- depression gets eliminated
- you become happier
doing physical activities increases our motivation to do things because when you are fit and you have more energy, you can always accomplish more things, and do them better.
keep it simple
doing physical activity does not mean to start right of the gym! you can do whatever you like, something that suits you and you enjoy it.
for example, a simple walk can bring a huge change in your life, it’s not a big deal, but the impact that it has on one’s life is just far more than you might think.
I used to walk early in the morning in the past few days. the change that it brought in my life was significant! I was truly happy, motivated, and especially I was booming from energy.
but when I left going for a walk, I saw that now,
- I don’t feel like doing anything
- I was lazy
- woke up late
- had less time to complete my daily tasks.
so this was what I experienced just with a simple walk.
next time, instead of thinking about what is true happiness? and how can I find it? do any physical activity. remove your worries! and go out for a walk.
4) be grateful
if you are grateful, you will never be depressed, because it shows us the positive parts of our lives.
most of the time we are too focused on others, that we don’t realize the beauty of our own life, we just see the bad face of our selves.
why does it happen? well, there are many reasons we focus on others, and then find negatives in our own selves. but the most common one is, we want more and more, and even more! the first thing that you should do is to, focus on yourself.
so when we focus on others, not on ourselves, we are put into a trap, we don’t celebrate the winnings of our lives, when we achieve something, we focus on our next goal, rather than realizing what we have done!
when we feel that we have done something meaning full, we get happy, because we realize that, I am something, at least I can do a little better things, you start to value yourself more! this brings true happiness within yourself.
if you want to be truly happy, you need to understand that, happiness is less related to what you have, but more with what you think, and what you do.
just focus on your self, comparisons kill your happiness, you just can’t compare mangoes with apples.
change your life a little, by changing your mourning routine with a simple walk. one little walk can really mean something in your life, it can make you a real-life hulk! (yeah).
so that’s what I had to say about true happiness if you think I am missing something or you wanna add something
feel free to tell us in the comment section.