You need to stop being too available before you lose your credibility and respect.
You know, It’s very common, When we see someone being too available to us, We want to avoid that person. So you don’t want to put yourself in this criteria if I am right?
Here you will learn the strategies that will help you stop being too available in a relationship.
Related: Raise your Standards
Table of Contents
Why You Need To Stop Being Too Available
Think about iPhone, Why is it so expensive, and why people are crazy about it, Even if that is rich or poor doesn’t matter, They just wanna grap iphone.
When iPhone is launching, people get in line one day before its launch, They wait in line for 24 hours to get their hands on iPhone.
Someone even bought the first spot for a few thousand dollars, just so that he will become the first buying iPhone 6.
I am not here to talk about iPhone, I want you to realize the power of “Being less available“, if you become like iPhone, limited in number, Your price will go higher and higher.
We Love Things That We Can’t Get
We love things that we can’t have, that we are not able to get easily. So don’t be someone that can be gotten easily, give a tough time to people to get you.
Realize the power of scarcity, we love things that are less in number, that’s just human nature, we can’t blame it.
If you are too available to anyone in this world, you will lose your importance in their eyes, don’t blame them, blame yourself.
What stays for long loses it’s attention.
How To Stop Being Too Available To Others
I am sure, I have convinced you to never stay for long. Now is the time to explore those strategies that will help you to stop being too available.
1) Get Lost For A Few Days
If you really wanna see people searching for you, You need to get lost for some time, Don’t be afraid of doing experiments.
If you want to sound interesting to people, and you want them to miss you, Then you must hide for a short time. You are not going to reply to any of the messages during these days. Become completely anonymous.
You are doing this because you want to show yourself as an important person, You are not always free, There are other things too in your life.
When you are done, Then just come back and appear like a surprise, It will boost your respect.
After all, Who doesn’t like surprises? Don’t be boring, Be a surpriser.
2) Be Unpredictable
When you act, write or talk like others expect, they dismiss you with little effort. They do it on autopilot because they’re so experienced at it.
Unpredictability is an art, Everyone doesn’t seem to be doing it, if you grab this art, you are gonna dominate others with this art.
If you reply the same way you are expected, if you act the same way you are expected, then it won’t make anyone think about you.
You have to make them think about you, That’s the goal, and you can do it by being unpredictable.
So that is why you need to change your attitude.
Why It Works
When you are unpredictable, When you act in a way that you are not supposed to do, Then Things are going to change abruptly.
Because they don’t have experience with what you did, it will make them think about their reaction too, How should they react now?
3) No, Big No
Psychology confirms, that saying no to there means saying yes to yourself, It increases your respect in other’s eyes.
There are times when you don’t wanna do anything, When you are not ready to do something, and you are asked to do it?
And you are like, If I say no, probably he/she will leave me, I will be blamed for this.
That’s not gonna happen, You got to bring the guts of saying no When you want to say it. It’s your right, and if you are not given this right, you are hanging with the wrong people.
Saying No Requires Courage
Don’t keep the promises that you can’t deliver. Instead say no, And of course saying no requires you to show a little courage and to wipe out your fears.
And this courage will make you respectable, maybe not for the short term, but in long run, They will take you as a truthful person.
You will be taken as a straightforward person, and who doesn’t like this kind of person?
4) Act Busy
Don’t bee too available, Becuase people think you are free Without knowing you are making time for them.
No one will realize that you are making your time for them, you are free just for them. They will keep this misconception of you being free.
They will take you for granted, Whenever they need you, They will remember you, Without any hesitation, Without respecting your personal space.
Psychology finds out, When you are busy and not available to people, You will increase your demand.
You Don’t Wanna Be That Person
You can’t allow someone to treat you like an option, It’s your life, Make it amazing.
So better show yourself bussy, Someone who is interested in his/her life and can’t sacrifice time for others. Make them feel that your life is more important, you can’t comprise on the quality of your life.
5) Get a Hobby
Find a hobby, It will make you happy, and you will be less stressed.
If you don’t have anything else, You will keep thinking about people, that’s natural.
You need to find something that will replace this habit, and you can do it by getting a hobby. It will keep you busy, you won’t see the need of connecting to someone.
Get up and find a hobby, there will be something that you love, just find that thing and enjoy it.
Here is what you can do for the hobby part.
- Read a book.
- Watch a documentary.
- Listen to a podcast.
- Join Gym.
- Read real-life stories.
These are just examples, you can do anything that you love, but there must be a hobby for you. Keep yourself busy with your hobbies, and stop being too available.
Related: Follow Your passion Quotes
6) Make Decision Power
Another most important thing, if you don’t want to be available all the time.
You must have the decision-making power, If your partner is the one that decides what needs to be done, Then it’s time to change the rule.
Have the ability to decide things, What we should do right now? When will we meet? Those are the things, that require your confidence to say.
So, The key thing is to Believe in yourself and act confidently in your decisions.
7) Schedule Your Day
Having a defined daily schedule will give you a sense of control, Which means you will focus more on what’s ahead then what happened in past, Which means you will focus on yourself, not other people. ( psychology finds out)
If you have a kind of pressure on you, Then there is no way you are gonna make yourself free for others at any cost. That’s where scheduling your day comes into play.
When you wake up in the morning and already have a list of things to complete, You won’t bother sending texts “Good morning”.
You Will Spend Your Day On Auto-Pilot
Deciding what you are gonna do throughout the day makes it easy for you cause of these reasons,
- Your day will be spent on autopilot.
- You don’t have to decide each time what you are gonna do.
- There won’t be random activities.
- You will already be prepared for upcoming tasks.
I can give you dozens of reasons that you should create a to-do list, but these should be enough to tell you why you need it.
Hence, Stop freeing yourself for others, It won’t do good to you, keep a busy schedule and focus on yourself.
How To Schedule Your Day
I am not a morning routine expert, But I can show you the best people that have changed thousands of lives of people through their morning scheduling expertise. ( this is an affiliate link)
Stefan James is the founder of projectlifemastery.com, Where he teaches people how to master every area of life, He has changed his own life, and he wants to it to the world how can they do it too.
8) Less Presence On Social Media
Social Media causes depression.
Always posting on Facebook and Instagram about what you did today, and what you are gonna won’t make you look good in other’s eyes.
There was a time when I was too much active on Facebook, and I wanted to show every moment of mine to the world. I wanted people to know about me from a to z.
Sadly, I was losing respect more than gaining. I didn’t know that people don’t care, They don’t want to know what I do.
Don’t Be Attention Seeker
Staying on social media for too long means, I want your attention, I want you to know about me and see how happy I am.
When you do this, It drags you down to the earth, it makes you look needy.
Here is what you should do to stop being too available,
- Turn off the active option in messenger.
- Don’t like, comment, or share anything.
- Don’t post more than two times a week.
- Never reply too early, Make them wait.
Turn invisible on social media for some days, and make yourself look like a busy dude.
9) Learn To Stay Alone
It’s better to be unhappy alone, than unhappy with someone.
You can’t allow anyone in this world to snatch your happiness. When you are too available to someone, You will be treated as an option.
If they like to meet they will, and if they don’t, They will not hesitate to disappoint you. Don’t ever be dependent on someone, no matter how much you love that person.
Becuase at the end, Even our shadow leaves us in the darkest moments, So why won’t these people?
Enjoy your own company, think about yourself in moments when you are alone, be your own friend. Take time thinking about your future, and career.
Focus on your goals, Work on yourself, Don’t be someone that everyone has, Be limited edition, And stop being too available.
It’s About Demand And Supply
You need to reject people sometimes so that you can increase your demand. Think about it this way, Watter is the most important thing in our life.
We can’t remain alive if we don’t drink water, but still, we don’t value it, Do you? no, you don’t value it either. I mean when you drink water, do you say, Wooh, That was awesome I feel amazing, I drank water.
Not at all, you just drink it and don’t think about it, That’s because it’s too much available, The supply of water is more than our needs.
But this water bottle costs 55,000, and if you purchase it, You will feel like you did something special. The only reason that makes this bottle special is its availability.
Everyone can’t afford it, and so when you buy it, It gives you feelings of uniqueness, You feel that you are not average, you are above than average.
The key takeaway is to stop being too available and increase your demand.
Related: Focus On Yourself Not Others.
10) Decide Your Priorities
If you have more than 2 priorities, you have no priority at all.
What’s most important to you? probably you don’t know it, because you haven’t thought about it. People are more important to you than goals.
If I talk of myself, My blog is more important to me than everything else, I won’t spend my time-solving problems for the people when it’s time to write on my blog.
First, understand what’s more important? and when you think about it, You will notice that there way more things you are missing.
To you, the most important thing should be,
- your future,
- your goals,
- and your career.
First, solve these headaches when you are done with them, then definitely you can solve the problems of people if you want.
But first thing first, Solve your own problems.
Key Points
Here are the key things to remember when you want to stop being too available.
- Disappear for a few days.
- Be unpredictable, Let them guess about you.
- Learn to say no.
- Act busy even if you are not.
- Get a hobby, Play something and enjoy.
- Make Decision power.
- Schedule your day.
- Spend less time on Facebook and Instagram.
- Learn to stay alone, Love your own company.
- Decide your priorities.
Final Words
Decide that you are not going to be too available because it’s ruining your personality and self-worth.
Don’t be that person which you can get easily, People should struggle if they want you, if they wanna hang out with you.
If you think being less available will wipe out some people from your life, let them be, Becuase they are not your friends, They are fake, They just wanna make use of you.
If someone is not comfortable with you, Becuase you demand your rights, your personal space, then it’s time to say goodbye to them, They don’t belong to you.
Decide it, Take action, and never be too available anymore.
Hope you got some motivation from this article, and if you did, you might wanna share your story with me.
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